Uses.

"The group I know for sure had used the dock for some storage and the office for administrative and general office use, and the repair facility for repair of their vehicles and the yard for tractor and trailers, in addition to passenger cars."

He may as well have said: "Brick red is red and sky blue is blue, royal purple is purple and chartruse is yellow, in addition to green."

"It's not wordy enough!"

From a letter to three county commissioners:

Included with this package I have outlined the Listing Agreement which I shows a specific commission to be paid upon the lease-up of the property when a tenant provided by the services of the Broker.

I turned it into this:

I have included the Listing Agreement with this package. It shows a specific commission to be paid upon the lease of the property when a tenant is provided by the Broker's services.

Now, I'm not the best writer in the world, but doesn't that work out much better? He told me it wasn't wordy enough, but I think he was just joking!

Got a four liner!

Good greif. Isn't this like three sentences?

Some of the reason that the market seems to be shifting in a more positive direction is that interest rates are now rising and many of the people who were tenants looking now to have equity in projects are now in a mode to start changing their mind and are thus going back to looking at tenancy as opposed to equity.

I won't even type the next one. It's just as bad and not as funny.

30 days.

How many times can you say the same thing in one sentence?

"The original contract calls for a 30 day notice to proceed the settlement on the part of Buyer to Seller (and this was not changed) that would mean that the 30 day notice to proceed the closing to bind the Seller no later than January 18th."

I had to ask what the point of that one was.

Found it!

This is a good example of a weird non-sentence.

"Answering the demand in the market while making sure that any standard objections that tenants would have would be eliminated from the project."

Reminder songs.

Certain songs remind me of very specific times. I'm listening to Third Eye Blind's "Thanks a Lot" and I could almost see and smell and feel my old bedroom. Sunlight through the big window and snuffed candles from the night before and the futon bed. I don't know why; I don't even like this song very much.

Shapes.

Today's sentence:

"The biggest issue would be the shape of some of the carpets, because of the expense involved."

Shaped carpets? Heart shaped? Kidney shaped? Stars? Triangles? What shape are these expensive carpets?

Sigh.